Internal and external focus

These last few months have been a time of realizations for me. It seems that as soon as I think I've figured everything out, I run headlong into another painful realization about myself. These last few days have been no exception to that rule.

One of the things I realized is that the one thing that has caused the greatest amount of unhappiness and disappointment in my life is my focus on my surroundings. I have come to realise that a true egoist thinks only of his own needs and focuses all his attention on other people, while a true philanthropist thinks of the needs of his fellow man but has the focus on himself. (For those of you who came to the FHE this week this might ring a few bells) Focus in this case being the direction of his energy and efforts.

You have all probably seen the newest coca-cola campaign (Life as it should be.) It catches with perfect simplicity the spirit of what I'm talking about.
The protagonist in the commercials gives a number of statements on how things should be. None of these things of course involving the protagonist himself or any effort on his part. He, serving as the archetype of true egoism, thinks only of himself and focuses on how his surroundings should be. It is tempting for us to assume the same stance in life. Focusing on how things should be and expecting the world to adapt. Since we have absolutely no control over the outside world and the world doesn't adapt to our liking, we end up frustrated because we are failing. It's easy (and very common) to blame the surrounding at this point. To claim that "they don't understand" or "it is unfair that they are given everything and I am given nothing" etc. etc. The list can be made long.

The only way to escape this feeling of abandonment and frustration
is to own up to our responsibility and realise that the only thing we can control is ourself. There is a quote I heard once but cant remember who said it. It goes like this:

"Don't go around thinking the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first." -Unknown.

It neatly sums up our position in this world. We have no claim on this world. There is no natural debt to us that will somehow be paid of by the world conforming to our opinions and wishes. Trying to demand any such rights will only lead to suffering and frustration on our part.

If we instead realize that it is in fact we who are in debt, that it is we who have been given everything and have only to manage our resources to affect our situations, this suffering and frustration can be avoided. In fact this is the only thing we can fully control: The choices we make with the resources we have been given. If we focus on ourselves and the resources we have been given we can use these resources to, when possible, fill the needs of others. Our resources are finite, and the effect they will have on the surrounding is limited. But realising this limitation will empower us to make active choices that will have a good effect on our surroundings and ourselves, and will help us increase the resources we dispose of and the effect we have on our surrounding. When speaking of resources we have to realise that these aren't just material resources. They are also our energy, our mental focus, our empathy, our kindness etc. the list goes on.

So think of your fellow man but focus on yourself as the active part.

I had intentions of writhing about a few other things today, but this turned out to be a lot of text so I will save all that for tomorrow. Have a great time and remember that you are in charge (I seem to be in slogan mode today:P)